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POLL: What do you think of Interracial Relationships? (Votes: 15)
I'm in, have been in, or would be in, and interracial relationship
 14 (93%)
I don't think that there's anything wrong with it, but it isn't for me
 1 (6%)
I think it's okay as long as there are no children involved
 0 (0%)
I think it is wrong
 0 (0%)
I would, but my family would disown me
 0 (0%)
Never really thought about it
 0 (0%)
Interracial Relationships
Post by sailonsilvergirl on Mar 9th, 2004, 03:26am

Remember...no racist comments! I'm just curious what everyone's views are...

Me I don't think there's anything wrong with it. I've had relations, though not a relationship, with a person of another race before, and I don't exclude anyone from the possibility of a relationship based on their race. And my family would be okay with it.

~sailingonby~
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Tammzzz on Mar 9th, 2004, 04:27am

I voted for no 1. I can't imagine why anybody would say it's "OK unless there is children involved" or anything like that. I can't see what difference it makes, and mixing of the gene pool is good for human development anyway.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Faith on Mar 9th, 2004, 05:14am

I voted for 1
I'm in an interracial relationship
I've grown up in a very predominantly white community, and even the state is quite predominantly white... meeting the guy I'm dating was very novel to me (we met when I was 14)
but honestly, people of other races just fascinate me. If anything, I'm over exuberant about it.
I never would have had a second thought about people of other colors, etc, if my mom hadn't one day told me "now just make sure you don't treat people differently because of the color of their skin" etc etc... That was the first thought I ever had about people being different just coz they look different. I think my family will care a whole lot more about the 13 yr age difference in my relationship than the racial issue, if/when they find out about it.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by blah blah on Mar 9th, 2004, 06:19am

Wow, that's a real big age difference !

I see nothing wrong with it. I mean, who cares about the color of someone's skin?
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by potato on Mar 9th, 2004, 1:38pm

I have been in an interracial relationship, and I would be in one again.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by jared:: on Mar 10th, 2004, 5:01pm

well i've had 2 asian girlfriends so i dont care about race, infact i prefer it more when i can date an asian girl so yea i think its ok.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by sailonsilvergirl on Mar 16th, 2004, 10:36am

Quote:
I can't imagine why anybody would say it's "OK unless there is children involved" or anything like that.


I just threw that one in there because I've heard someone say that before...

Glad to see everyone so far is completely open minded.

~sailingonby~
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by m on Mar 16th, 2004, 10:38am

This may seem like a great idea and the thought of me hooking up with a non-white girl is exotic. But if the relationship leads to a family with children, the children are going to have a rough time. There are many stories where the child of a bi-racial couple can’t identify with either race and have been shut out by either parents’ parents.

Like it or not, we identify most with people who are like us, and if there is no way to identify with either, we’re not going to be happy people. Not to mention the teasing a child of bi-racial parents has to go through just because someone thought well of a social experiment. Kids these days have enough crap to deal with from being teased because they’re not wearing the latest fashions to having to refuse drugs from peers and schools trying to push ADD meds on them. But not having anyone to identify with runs deeper than skin color or culture.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Tammzzz on Mar 16th, 2004, 12:02pm

You bring up some interesting points there Aztec, but if we don't push things forward so integration is seamless, it will never happen. I'm actually looking forward to a world where cultures and races are mixed together and nobody on either side of a former devide would think twice.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by potato on Mar 16th, 2004, 2:25pm

kids get teased for wearing glasses, for being overweight, for being too skinny, for being too tall or too short. but that doesn't mean that it would be easier for kids if none of them had these characteristics.

there are much more important reasons that can make you identify with someone than the way they look. what about interests? i can identify with people who like the same music i do, people who have the same pasttimes as i do. i can identify with people who have the same beliefs as i do, whether they are about religious, political, or social issues.

both of my parents are iranian. i don't identify with iranians. i don't see them on tv, in movies, in magazines. none of my good friends are iranian. being iranian has nothing to do with me as a person and i identify with people who are similar to me as a person. iran is just the country my parents grew up in.

most of the students in my school are white. most of my friends are white. most of the people i meet and talk to are white. i don't know any iranian boys... what are the chances that i'm going to find one that i will want to marry?

i think race is such a silly idea. i don't even know what it means anymore....
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by blah blah on Mar 17th, 2004, 06:31am

Aztec did bring up a good point. I have a biracial friend and while we were growing up, people would go up to and ask her if she was white or black and if she said white, they said that she wasn't white and if she said black they said that she wasn't black. It was pretty sad. But, I do think that people of other races being together is fine. I mean, in the long run, skin color doesn't really matter at all. There are many more important things in the world than skin color.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by m on Mar 18th, 2004, 1:57pm

It can be a good idea and there are always exceptions. But while kids will be teased, there's no need to give them something else to be teased about.

As for pushing the envelope, as long as we're willing to do it too, and not leave it up to the child instead of telling them to shut up and deal with it. They don't know they're on the forefront of change. They just know that they don't know where they fit in and want someone to fix it.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Shefalls2earth on Mar 18th, 2004, 2:23pm

i voted number one because there is nothing to skin color its just whats underneath.. get what i mean
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Tammzzz on Mar 18th, 2004, 2:28pm

Was she white or black? A pretty dumb question cos most "white" (in appearance) people have African or Asian blood in them. So, in truth non of us can answer that properly. We are all mixed anyway. That's why the question of going with someone from nominally another race is actually an irrelavent one.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Ms_Thing on Mar 18th, 2004, 8:53pm

wow why didn't she jsut say "I am caucasian and african american"

I have a friend whos black and asian.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by potato on Mar 18th, 2004, 8:56pm

i think a lot of biracial people are really beautiful, because they often look so different.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by blah blah on Mar 19th, 2004, 06:13am

Tammi, she was half black, half white. Her dad, who ran away when she was three, was black, and her mom was white. But, she was really light in appearance. Last time I talked to her though, she said that she had gotten a really nice tan.

MsThing, I guess that she was trying to find herself and instead of saying that she was biracial she said that she was black or white. I guess that for a while she wanted to identify herself with one race or something like that. I don't know for sure why she didn't just say that. But, I think, now she does just tell people that she is biracial.

Tammi, you brought up a good point about how all people are actually from the same place originally. I mean, the first skeletons were found in Africa.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Faith on Mar 20th, 2004, 01:15am

on Mar 16th, 2004, 10:38am, ◊ ¢À Aztec Camera ¢À ◊ wrote:
if the relationship leads to a family with children, the children are going to have a rough time. There are many stories where the child of a bi-racial couple can¡¯t identify with either race and have been shut out by either parents¡¯ parents.

Like it or not, we identify most with people who are like us, and if there is no way to identify with either, we¡¯re not going to be happy people. Not to mention the teasing a child of bi-racial parents has to go through just because someone thought well of a social experiment. Kids these days have enough crap to deal with from being teased because they¡¯re not wearing the latest fashions to having to refuse drugs from peers and schools trying to push ADD meds on them. But not having anyone to identify with runs deeper than skin color or culture.



I don't agree at all... both of my boyfriend's daughters are bi-racial. He is black and both of his daughter's moms are white. They're beautiful children and the younger one is remarkably well adjusted. (the older one's issues stem more from her mom taking her away from him when she was young, etc, they have nothign to do with her racial background). Kids with multi-racial backgrounds are so common now that I can't imagine it being an issue, and saying that it's not right to bring bi-racial children into the world is like saying that unattractive people shouldn't have children together, because then their children run the risk of being teased because of the way they look.

Having two or more races in your background just means you have more history and more culture and more amazing things to learn about yourself and where you came from.

When it comes to being shut out by the parents' parents... well, that happens regardless of racial background, as well. In laws are in laws, and they can be accepting or not be, and it's their problem and their loss. Children will find people who they can identify with, and as I and many other people I know have experienced, children will also find people who are not blood relations to be their 'family'.

Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Velouria on Mar 20th, 2004, 04:38am

I don't see the big debate. Honestly, I don't see why this is even an issue. Discussing it is a ridiculous idea - people have different colour skin and they want to have relationships. Deal with it.

The whole 'think of the poor bullied children' argument is outdated and overdramatised. Rather than telling interracial couples not to have kids, we should be telling people not to raise their damn kids to be racist.

Do we want to change society? Or do we want to sit and hide in our comforable white or black or asian or pink or green or yellow homes and say that our children are safe because they don't have the ethnic diversity we could all benefit from?
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Mantra on Mar 20th, 2004, 2:57pm

^ Well said
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by busybodies on Mar 28th, 2004, 09:34am

I would definitely have a relationship with somebody outside my ethnic group, even though I know my family would disapprove. I don't see the point in being kept away from other cultures just because of a difference in skin colour. That said... cultural differences are huge and sometimes you'd be better off with someone who has the same background as you. Relationships are hard enough as it is. Throw an entirely different culture and customs into the equation and it'll only make it harder.

Quote:
Tammi, you brought up a good point about how all people are actually from the same place originally. I mean, the first skeletons were found in Africa.

We've evolved, we've moved on. Skeletons are just the blueprint. It's the final touches that make the difference.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by m on Mar 29th, 2004, 11:26am

saying that it's not right to bring bi-racial children into the world is like saying that unattractive people shouldn't have children together, because then their children run the risk of being teased because of the way they look.

What I was getting at, is just because it's may look cool and the result child is physically attractive, he or she will still have to put up with alot of issues beyond being teased. More like outright, being shut out. Granted, there are exceptions. I'm just pointing out something to be aware of.

That said... cultural differences are huge and sometimes you'd be better off with someone who has the same background as you. Relationships are hard enough as it is. Throw an entirely different culture and customs into the equation and it'll only make it harder.

Boy ain't that the truth! But I think that's more between the parents of the two involved rather than the couple. But I can see how it might seem to be a neat idea to start out, but a few years into the relationship, you are going to hit bumps in the road that you will either have the guts to work out, or just crumble and do the east way. Divorce, but do it before the kids come.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by busybodies on Mar 29th, 2004, 11:44pm

Quote:
But I think that's more between the parents of the two involved rather than the couple.


Families are included in the difficulties. Hell, they're the cause of most of the problems. Especially if you're living in close proximity to the in-laws
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by JasonNewsted on Apr 4th, 2004, 03:46am

^ busy, i just knew u were gonna say that
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by busybodies on Apr 4th, 2004, 06:58am

^^ haha, well you know where it's coming from...
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Tammzzz on Apr 4th, 2004, 6:15pm

Veloria really reinforced my original sentiments on the issue actually.

If the inlaws have some issue or other, they are welcome to go forth and fornicate, to live their narrow minded, small brained, ignorant little lives in the isolation they deserve.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by sailonsilvergirl on Apr 4th, 2004, 8:12pm

yes!

~sailingonby~
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Rasa on Apr 8th, 2004, 12:29pm

It's gotten so that I hardly see people as white or black or asian or anything else any more. Everyone is just a person, that's all. I have no problem with interracial relationships, and the only thing I find disgusting is when other people say they find interracial realtionships disgusting. I just can't stand intolerance!*

*and yes, I know that's an oxymoron
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Ginnytrix LeStrange on May 1st, 2004, 6:06pm

It's just silly. We're all people. As for kids having identity problems I think that is outdated. I know plenty of people with interracial parents and they don't have a problem with it and other people don't have a problem with it. In my highschool we had many interracial couples and no one thought anything of it. I think it depends on where you live though. Some communities might not be as excepting but around where I live no one seems to have a problem with it.
Re: Interracial Relationships
Post by Tammzzz on May 1st, 2004, 6:55pm

It's a question of education really. And re-education if necessary. I think the internet helps in this, as it shows time and time over how many people from different cultures can interact with no problem.

Some people from a rural community who have only experienced their own race can surf the net and learn about other people in the world.

Take a message board community like this one. We've got people here with every skin colour and every religion. We may have the odd rant here and there, but where you come from really doesn't matter.